Wednesday, February 22, 2023

Forever 16 - Maturity Gone With The Wind

 These are just my random thoughts when watching the world around. I am not saying anything is good or bad, but if anyone gets any point to improve their life, I am happy.

The Grace and Maturity

Decades back when I went with my husband after our marriage to his aunt’s (mamiji) house, his maternal grandmother was alone at home, who was knitting a sweater. She was a little dark complexioned, wrinkles on her face, but when I set my eyes on her, my heart was filled with love and respect. The thought “I would like to have her type of aura when I grow old” crossed my mind. She personified grace and maturity to me.

Touching feet of elders

It is very prevalent in North India to touch the feet of elders, especially for a new bride. I had to touch the feet of so many relatives, not that I enjoyed touching all those feet. By this gesture, one imbibes the culture of the person who is touched, and I had sense of energy from early on. But with some people, I really had this strong urge to touch and be blessed with some of their good qualities!

I could see many people of older generation who exuded grace, maturity and wisdom. If I am a newlywed at this point in time and I have to touch the feet of older people, I think I’ll be in a total dilemma. Because very few people got that inner sense of maturity and grace these days.

Everybody is a sweet sixteen

In my early days, a lady used to look like a wife after marriage, like a mother after having kids and like a grandma after grand children came to their life. But now majority want to look like they are in their teens by the way they dress up, do their makeup and in their behaviour! The maturity may be coming when one does the duties that come with changing relationships whole heartedly. When a mother is neglecting the house and kids and doing fashion shows, will she look like a mother or a model?

It’s my life

We come from a culture where family was considered above self, clan above the family, village above the clan, and country above the village. This view seems to be in shambles. I have to admit I see a revival slowly in some aspects, which is very heartening. In general, the thought pattern is,” It is my life; my happiness is of utmost importance, above everything else. Why should I consult my parents in choosing a life partner? I don’t believe in making any sacrifice. Every chore should be in a 50/50 pattern between husband and wife. Why should I make tea every day for my in-laws?”

Role of physical body and immediate gratification

Our soul is clothed in this physical body and the latter is designed for physical work. With all the modern gadgets and western commodes, this is hardly happening these days, leading to chronic diseases and tablet dependent life.

Another debilitating factor is the wanting of immediate results. When married youngsters come to me with the complaint of husbands not behaving as they should be, my advice is “Do what you expect them to do, and make sure they are watching it (this should be done discretely, don’t throw it on their face) and over the years, subconsciously they will imbibe that character. One has to be patient. Do this for 25 years. On 26th year, come back to me. I am sure you will have a different story to tell.”

Yes, that is the fact. Things take time in life. You can’t plant a mango seed and expect mango the next month. You may say that some plants give flowers within a month. But we are talking of long term relationships. If you are looking for short term relationships, I take my words back.

Go beyond the physical body

Anything in this physical world has a life cycle. A bud cannot remain a bud. It has to bloom, spread its fragrance and beauty, then dry and wither off. When it is in the stage of full bloom or drying, if you gather all the petals, tie them together and spray some perfume, will it look like a bud? 

Think in similar terms about human beings.

Let us be grateful to have got this human birth, use the physical body as it is supposed to be, start thinking about the omnipresent soul residing inside, and begin doing things to let the soul complete its journey. If one doesn’t do it in this life, while taking the next incarnation, it will start from where it was left. That is perfectly ok with majority, but this article is not for them.

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