Nectar of Life

I have been toying with the idea of doing a ten day Vipassana course since long time. Then the urge started getting very strong and I signed up for the January second half.

We had to reach the place by 3 pm on the previous day. I got a double room and my room mate was a 1^st year Ayurveda course student. We reached the room and just arranged our things. There was hardly any time to talk to her before the gong sounded for the evening tea. Afterwards the instructions for the next ten days was given and they announced that the course just started, which meant no more communication with each other, through talking, sign language or eye contact. We were expected to move around with down cast eyes. The areas for male and female were totally separated. Then we had our first meditation session. In the hall that could accommodate about 100 people, the vibration was great and the mind was not wandering during the meditation.

Next morning, at the sound of the gong, we got up at 4 am and got ready, packing ourselves with warm clothes and went for the meditation at 4.30 am. It lasted till 6.30, drowsiness was a problem during this two continuous hours. The gong sounded at 6.30 and we were off to the dining hall for the breakfast. Coming to the room my room mate and I did our morning rituals systematically and I was really astonished that without verbal communication also how we could function so easily and efficiently.

From 8 am to 11 am the next meditation session, every one and a half hours we were given five minutes ‘rest’ period when we could stretch ourselves and drink water. Delicious lunch was served at 11 o’clock. Well, it was not delicious for every body because it was not oily or spicy food. During the free time till the next meditation session at 1 o’clock, my room mate and I chose to have a nap. I am not one who takes naps, but after sitting continuously for meditation, one just wants to stretch on the bed and then naturally the sleep God takes over.

From one o’clock to 5 pm was the longest session of the day, with of course five minutes rest period in between. The evening fruit and tea was at five and after that we could walk around in the restricted area. From 6 to 9 pm again it was meditation, with one hour presentation of Shri S N Goenka in between. The presentation explained the philosophy of Vipassana and gave instructions for the meditation technique for the next day. The fact that no dinner was served (exceptions for medically compromised participants) was a difficult situation for many.

There were ladies above 60 years of age on my left side, and to my right were foreign participants. The old ladies had tough time sitting in the same posture for long time and kept on shifting. But to my surprise, by fourth and fifth day, they could sit in cross legged position for one hour stretches. Some of the foreign participants were yoga practitioners, so it was a joy to see them sitting like sadhus for the meditations.

The first four days were comparatively boring, since we were being trained to develop the sensitivity to the bodily sensations. Fifth day onwards it was amazing for me. After all these years of preparations in different aspects of spirituality, I felt as if I got at last the missing link! It was a different first hand experience to see clearly how one creates the web of Maya around oneself, and an exhilarating sense of relief to obtain the method to stop creating new karmic knots, and also to gradually keep opening the old karmic knots. I got the technique, now it is in my hands to walk the path and reach the final goal.

On the ninth day morning the vow of silence was over. We were instructed not to touch one another, even though we could now talk. I could understand why it was so; the energy that had built up in our system due to the silence was so much that some time was needed for its proper assimilation. It is unimaginable how much energy we conserve by remaining silent. In other words, what a tremendous amount of energy is wasted every moment by needless conversations and thoughts!

I reached my room and in a few seconds, one of the foreign participants, from an island near France, came to meet me. She told, ‘You are the first lady I wanted to talk to after the silence period. It was a joy to sit near you during meditations. You were sitting like a stone, not fidgeting in between like many others.’ I thanked her and told it was due to my yoga practice.

It was not easy to stay in isolation from the outside world for ten days, but every moment spent there was worth it. Now I got the essence of living, the proper technique to deal with day to day ups and downs. I got the first hand experience of the tremendous energy and power within us. One needs to just delve inside, to draw the energy; there is no need to keep hugging others for the sole purpose of extracting their energy!

Why is it that the one who filled your heart once

Has to empty it completely now?

Why is it that all your words once listened to,

Are received with hatred later?

Why is it that those eyes that exuded love,

Now refuse to look at your face?

Why is it that the one that shared so much,

Has nothing to say now?

Why is it that the involvement considered love,

Now feels smothering?

Why is it that the opinions once heeded to,

Seems like taking control over the other?

Oh my heart, understand the rules of this mortal world,

Nothing remains the same, everything has to change.

We are here to experience both sides of the coins.

Move ahead, and learn the lessons

There is no time to mourn, there is no time to mourn!

It was the spark in your eyes,

That brought me to you, yes.

And destiny pulled us together,

For life’s lessons to gather.

As each dream started coming true,

Faith and trust firmly made them glued.

Beauty of the dream house attracted,

Many a craving soul who coveted.

To own beautiful possessions,

They longed without many exertions.

Flying in the air you didn’t mind,

Letting them in from behind,

Unaware of the faith and trust,

Being eaten away most.

All things once beautiful,

Slowly turned more awful.

Opinions once given credit to,

Are no longer worthy of listening to.

As new players came into the field,

Their words to your heart you held.

It was the spark in your eyes,

That brought me to you, yes.

But now those eyes don’t consider,

My face worthy to ponder.

As I count my blessings,

Each day that brings,

I thank God for the spark in your eyes,

What if it is for others!

Though I have traveled quite a bit, when I saw Ladakh, there were no words to describe its beauty. The deep colors of the sky, changing colors of the lakes, possibility of witnessing a snowstorm, thunderstorm and a sand storm in the same trip of about 8 hours; these are unique in this region. Within a period of hours one will pass through desert, snow clad mountains and lakes. There are beautiful flowers to see and admire. And the taste of luscious peaches and apples, oh my God, it is divine!

The people are innocent and so helpful. We could get awesome food throughout the stay of two weeks. For the spiritually inclined, the monasteries give opportunity to experience divine vibrations and deep meditations.

But before deciding on a trip to the mountains, one has to keep certain things in mind. For anyone having asthmatic attacks, it is better to stay away from the adventure. With the oxygen levels dipping down drastically, they can have a difficult time.

If you have two weeks to spare, you can stay in Leh and make trips to the lakes on mountains. We used to go to one lake, stay overnight in the tent and come back to Leh the next day. In some places the tent will have attached toilet, but other times, it may be common toilet outside the tent. The road journey to the lakes will take about 7 to 8 hours and when you have to use the toilet during the journey, you should know what to expect.

The toilet is a deep pit, over which some wooden planks are kept. The spaces between the planks are very wide, giving a full view of the contents below and if your nose is sharp, you will have to hold your breath. I was shocked to see that even in some of the monasteries, toilets are of this type.

Wherever the tents are put up, there is no electricity and they provide light from 8 pm to 10 pm with generators. That means there is no hot water supply. They do give warm water to drink. Forget about taking bath during the stays in the tents. But don’t worry, you won’t be allowed to stay for more than two days.

They do provide good blankets for night, but when the temperature is so low, the touch of the blanket or bed sheet will be like that of ice. You can get hot water bags if you request, that is what made it possible for me to gather courage to get into the bed.

The 7 to 8 hour journeys will be through very bumpy roads and by the end, all your neck muscles will be aching so badly due to the continuous jerking. But next morning after your hot water bath (when ever you are in Leh, not near the lakes) you will feel so fresh and ready to take on the trip for the day.

Breathing is going to be strenuous due to the dipping oxygen levels. Climbing ten steps will make you feel like you had been jogging for ten minutes. Towards the end of two weeks, you will be feeling much better, because the body will get acclimatized.

In spite of all this, I would still recommend that it is a journey worth embarking upon!

The fruit of sin, Oh so beautiful

Look at the mesmerizing color,

The fragrance has made many

Go mad with desire to possess.

To eat or not to eat this fruit of sin,

Is within your control, but isn’t it mean

Not to avail the opportunity,

Who’s bothered about the price

That has to be paid?

As the delicious fruit melts in the mouth,

One is hooked, and wants more and more

And starts finding ways to cheat the loved ones,

Justifications to the sinful deed,

Are many in the mind.

When the flesh is eaten,

And the seed is approached,

The bitterness seep in,

The desire to spit out creep in.

Alas! That’s not the Nature’s way,

The lips get sealed and one is forced,

To chew and take the bitterness totally in.

To eat or not to eat, that is the choice

Nature gives us, but once you take,

There’s no other way than to suffer,

The consequences till the last.

This is a very important aspect of life. More important than what you are, how one plays the role is going to make all the difference in life. The greatest example is that of Sant Rahidas, who was a cobbler by profession. He would always be chanting and thinking about Vitthal, getting lost in his thoughts about God by singing his praise even while working.

So whatever one may be, what is it that one is doing during most of the time is going to define that person and this helps us to decide whether he/she deserves to have ‘satsang’ with. Human life is sacred, and each moment lost may mean another life time to come back to rectify the mistake.

Should we plan things or just be spontaneous? There are people who will argue vehemently for both the views. As always, I look upon Nature for guidance. Does Nature plan things? You bet. Just as the summer heat spreads, we find water melons ready to be eaten. If the flowering didn't happen at the time it did, do you think the fruits will be ready? The birds prepare nests before laying eggs. We will get ample examples around us.

But we as human beings are an elevated lot, right? As for me, it is not whether one should plan or not, the important aspect is in not getting attached to the result of our planning. Using our intellect and common sense, we have to plan things that need to be planned, but if they don't go the way they are planned, it should not affect our mental status. It also helps to have the faith that something better is in the offing, that's why the plan didn't materialize.

Then there are aspects where spontaneity is needed. Let's enjoy the surprises in life too.

For one who does multi tasking, planning makes life smooth and enjoyable, otherwise it can be hectic and very tiresome. Like if I want to enjoy home made dosas on Sunday morning, I have to plan and start preparations right from Saturday morning.

At the same time, I enjoy the surprises during a vacation trip, when minor aspects are not planned. So it is for us to decide which aspects of life need planning.